Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Submission Exercises

I have been spending months looking up submission exercises online, trying to come up with my own, writing down things that made me feel submissive from stories, things that just come up in my dreams, and things the Duke has done out of the blue that have made me melt.  This list has really helped us, some we have tried, some we have not, but I know how hard it can be to find ideas, so I hope it's okay to share.  There are too many to share in one post, so I'm going to share a few tonight, and will do more in another post, it will take a few posts to do the whole list we have.

I am going to list things you can do on your own, or things your husband can do that may help you.

Things Your Husband Can Do:
1.  Say her full name - I don't know about you, but having my full name said makes me SIT UP at attention!  Attention, and boy, I better behave.
2.  Holding her chin - This really makes me feel owned, and that he is INSISTING on having my attention
3.  Having a pet name for her - Being called his, baby girl, little one, or my good girl really sends a shiver of submissive pleasure down my spine.  It's these words that make me see he really does like being dominant.
4.  Ask her who she belongs to - Sometimes the Duke will ask me this, and it will put everything into perspective for me.  I'm his, and he's got me.  I don't have to worry about things being taken care of, he's got it.
5.  Tell her to keep eye contact with you - Oh, I find this so hard, and when I have to be told, I often struggle, and have to be reminded.  But I find this very humbling, and it really does remind me to obey, even when it is hard, whether it be when discussing rules, talking about something hard, or when being intimate.
6.  Remind her that her body is yours - I find I get VERY submissive when the Duke goes to touch me in a way that makes me shy or embarrassed, and then I go to cover myself, only to have him tell me that I am not to cover or hide what is his.
7.  Call her during the day to check in - I love knowing the Duke likes to check up on me, it makes me feel important and worthy of his attention, it also reminds me to be good, because I don't want to have to tell him over the phone or email that I wasn't so good.  It's hard enough in person, it's even harder when I can't see his expression
8.  Tell her to answer with words - I find it hard to swallow at first when in an intense situation where the Duke asks a question, and so I answer with body language.  But now he demands my answer in words every time.  I feel the peace of submission flood through me as I find my voice to obey him, but also am floored by his authority in the moment.

Things You Can Do Yourself:
1.  Do one of his chores just because you want to make him feel special, or make his day easier.  Make it one that takes effort, and even better, make it one you aren't that happy to do.  When you are done, you will realize he now will be the one that won't have to do it.
2.  Make a meal he likes that isn't your favourite, but not something you hate.  Our men notice when we put them ahead of ourselves, and one big way to do that is to eat a meal that you made for his pleasure, not yours.
3.  Ask him if there is something you don't do that he'd like you to do.  ie, start/stop wearing make up.  Start/stop doing your hair a certain way.  Greet him at the door with a drink, have supper ready when he gets home, have the kids entertained when he walks through the door, serve him before yourself at meal times, or what have you.
4.  Write lines, or a small essay on why you are glad he leads you.  Or on ways he leads you.  You might be surprised at all he's doing that has gone unnoticed until you sat down to really think about it.
5.  Leave a note for him in his lunch/briefcase/wallet.  Maybe even make a promise to him of something you wish to do for him that night. ;)  Sign it with a kiss.
6.  Start asking for permission when you buy things, if you can't ask for permission, tell him at the end of every day each place you spent money, and why.
7.  Put on something that isn't exactly your favourite, but something you know he'll love.  Could be a perfume, a thong, a slinky dress, risque heals.  Or go without something, a bra, your underwear, and then whisper to him your little secret half way through his dinner. ;)
8.  Let him know that you are giving him your body, to use when, and how he likes.  Whether it be the middle of the night, or in a position you've been too shy to try before.  Your body is his, and you trust him to take care of it.

I wrote down a ton more, and will try to post more later this week.  I hope you like one or two of the ideas.  Who knows, maybe you've heard them all, or only a few, but I hope there is at least one or two here that catch your fancy. :)

Have fun everyone. :)

Submission Exercises - Continued - Post 2 is HERE
Submission Exercises - Conclusion - Post 3 is HERE
Submission Exercises - When Sick (Added at a later time)

22 comments:

  1. Wow Esmay what an impressive list :) I really liked it. It's funny when reading this I found my head nodding agreeably with all of them and realise a lot of these things we do without having ever thought about it :)

    Thanks for sharing this :)

    Hugs x

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    1. Thank you, Missy. :) I know what you mean, we do naturally fall into these rolls, and becoming submissive, and doing those actions just becomes
      second nature. ;) {{{hugs}}}

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  2. Hi Es May, awesome list! You did a great job :) I too was nodding reading some of these. We do a number of these and as Missy said, some without having really thought about it. Some of the other ideas gave me food for thought too. Thanks for sharing.

    Hugs,
    Roz

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    1. Thank you, Roz. :) I love giving people food for thought, as I love having those nuggets as well, those thoughts that give me moments to ponder. :) {{{hugs}}}

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  3. Food for thought for all of us. It is always good to stop and think...and have new suggestions...to help us along the way. hugs abby

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    1. It is. abby, as much as I love the lists we have, I will always welcome ways and ideas to help feed and foster my submissive side. :) {{{hugs}}}

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  4. Great ideas Es May! :)

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  5. Thanks for this list Es May, we do some of the ones you mentioned but I could always do more of the ones on my own, I think they would help me when my submission isn't coming as easily as I would like.
    Scarlet ; )

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    1. Singing Heart Mama, I so know what you mean about submission not always coming as easily as we'd like. :) Sometimes doing the list for my own helps, but sometimes I just go to the Duke and admit my struggles. :)

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  6. always looking for new ideas myself thanks for sharing these are great. I've gotta steel the note in his wallet thing. when I go without panties I like to slip them in his pocket :-P

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    1. Coral, hehehe, I have heard of women that do the pocket trick... I have yet to be that brave, but maybe someday! :)

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  7. Awesome list EsMay !!!!!

    Callie

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    1. Thank you, Callie, after reading your list, that means a lot to me. :)

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  8. I love your list EsMay.
    I wrote a list similar to this in my journal the other day, I think I got up to about 25. H enjoyed reading it and I found him paying a bit more attention to his actions too.

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    1. Janey, if you ever feel inclined to share it, I'd love to hear what you wrote down. :) But either way, it really does help a couple to have these ideas on hand. :)

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  9. Awesome list EsMay!! I'm going to share this post with my husband! Thank you

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    1. Thank you, Jennelle. :) I hope that he finds something useful in it as well. :)

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  10. Many of these things have been a part of my life for over thirty years, Sweetie, so maybe I am more submissive than I realise. I figure that the more you love someone, the more you want to do to show your love, and they you realise that person is returning your love many times over. I hope your Duke knows what a loving and considerate wife he has? It seems to me that you are a very special person. Both lists were a pleasure to read.

    Many hugs
    Ami

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    1. Hey Ami, that is so amazing to think of 30 years, what a blessing to you. :) I don't know if the Duke knows that or not... I think I'd feel rather unhumble to ask, lol, but maybe I'll be brave and do it sometime. :) {{{hugs}}}

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  11. I'm thinking maybe I need to print out your three lists and try to figure out what works. I just feel a bit stuck right now. Thank you for posting these!

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    1. I missed your reply, somehow. Sorry about that. I think that's the key, rose, finding what works for us. :) {{{hugs}}} And I'm sorry you're feeling stuck, but if it helps, it happens to all of us at times.

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